2020-09-23

Sending that Little Onion to College

So, you’re finally ready to send off your little onion to college. You’ve watched it grow since it was a tiny seed, and you’ve tried to instill all the love that you can while they were growing up.

It hasn’t been easy, you know– all that time trying not to cry.

And yet the hardest time is yet ahead– because, being an onion yourself, you’re not sure how much federal funding you can get to send your prized child to floss farming college where he can learn the benefits of regular teeth cleaning.

Fear not, there’s a site to help you fill out your federal FASFA forms. It can guide you step by step to help you fill in your income, their social security number and how many times they almost made it onto a VeggieTales DVD. They love to provide assistance to you and your family so that you don’t have to do it alone.

Yes, and you can also find out FASFA secrets– things that the gourd family down the street does not know.

So, what are you waiting for– find out how you can get money from the government now, before someone starts peeling little Olivia and you really start to cry!

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